You’re Breaking my Heart

We are in Tucson at Gram and Bubba’s and it is the 4th of July. There are fire works and we all go out to watch them. It’s about 9pm, and I’m pretty tired. I was sitting with mommy but then decided to go sit with gram. Then changed my mind again but when I went back to sit with mommy, Jaffe was on her lap. So I just pushed myself up there. Mommy said, ‘No, honey, Jaffe is sitting here now.’ I got upset immediately, and starting crying and pushing cause I wanted to sit on mommy’s lap without Jaffe being up there. Mommy was adamant, said it was Jaffe’s turn and that I needed to find somewhere else to sit. This drove me banana’s  because it isn’t fair - I want to sit on mommy’s lap! Alone! Right now! 

I got very upset, threw a fit and then mommy just picked me up and took me inside. No!! Now I’m missing the fireworks!  She took me into the bedroom where she started to get me undressed and put my PJ’s on. Then I really freaked out because I don’t want to go to bed right now! 

So I cried, kicked and screamed, because I haven’t figured out yet, that if I want something, kicking and screaming isn’t the way to get it. Mommy needed a break from the kicking and screaming so she left the room but I followed her, yelling at her. I was so mad and so frustrated. I wasn’t getting what I want and mommy was walking away from me and ignoring me. Finally I bawled, “You’re breaking my heart! You’re breaking my heart!” 

Mommy was amazed by this statement. It touched her. I have no idea where I heard that but it’s what I was feeling. Mommy took me in her arms and we hugged a long time and then had a long talk in bed about how it’s important for me to be calm and ask nicely for what I want. I agree to this while stroking mommy’s face and hugging her. I love her so much and she loves me too.

It’s so Beautiful

It was Frank Lang's birthday and mommy and daddy were going to his party separately. Daddy was there already. We were having dinner and mommy told us about her wedding video and Jaf and I wanted to watch it! So we sat on the couch, with mommy in the middle, and watched the day she got married to daddy. The video was just finishing when daddy came through the door. Mommy got up and went to the bathroom to freshen up and daddy sat down between us. The end of the wedding video is a freeze frame shot of mommy and daddy kissing and when I saw this I burst into tears. Mommy came out of the bathroom and wondered what had happened? Jaffe said, “Bailey’s crying because he’s so happy!” Well, mommy was very confused - a 4 year old boy crying tears of joy is slightly unusual! She came over and sat with me and I couldn’t catch my breath. I was bawling. She asked me if I was hurt, I shook my head, no. She asked me if I was sad. I shook my head, no. She asked me if I was crying because of the wedding video. I said through my tears, ‘Yes.’ She asked if it was because mommy and daddy were kissing and I said, ‘Yes.‘ Then I exclaimed,  ‘It’s so beautiful!’ and I started to cry even harder. I felt this deeply, it touched my heart seeing them kiss, and it made me cry. Mommy started crying too and hugged me a lot. After she left for the party I cried for about another hour, daddy later told mommy. I just couldn’t stop. 

J Tree B

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